plural.blujai831.dev

Alice

Pronouns
she/her
Name origin
Alice in Wonderland, because she was drugged out and woke up in an unfamiliar world where the rules didn't make sense.
Subjective age
22. Sometimes regresses to 8.
Favorite color
Blue
Favorite animal
Mouse.
Strengths
somehow, she made it through. that's the only strength she needs.
Weaknesses
doesn't work like that. not after what she had to endure.
Holds traumatic memories
Suitcase incident. That's the main one, the biggest one, and the one held by Alice proper. In addition, she carries the burdens of Alice-II and Alice-III. she used to think that if she had to spend another day trapped in this cursed place she would surely shatter like glass and break apart into 3 Alices. but... somehow, she persisted. and now.. she's free.
Holds stress response
Fawn. once upon a time.
Holds shameful behaviors
isolation, sui ideation. it'll take work to fix those but what's important is she's finally gotten to the point where the work is possible.
Holds learned skills
surviving
Copes with shame
by knowing it wasn't her fault.
Copes with fear
not very well. but we're getting there
Copes with grief
this is still a hard one sometimes
Darkest thought
my mind is clean now. the rain washed it away. the only dark thoughts i have left are dark memories and i finally know how to live with them.
Formative belief
that i deserved this. that there was no escape. that i wasn't enough, could never be enough. but now...

I... I have nothing to say here. I have no words. She's changed so much I don't feel like I know what I'm looking at anymore.

Relations

Lucy-α
Lucy
i respect her.
Penelope
it's not her fault.
Anabelle
oh, anabelle...
Daisy
it's going to be okay. we'll get through this.
May
i'm so angry for her
Oliver
this... i'm sorry. i can't face this yet. not yet. i can't.
Oliver*
Alice
"the girl who could survive anything." that's what lucy used to say, right? haha... oh, sorry, it's nothing.
Alice-II
Alice-III
Singer
you are not broken. your heart is going to grow back.
Singer-α
Alice was a part within Singer-α. That was a different Alice. Wait, really? No, not like that. Not like that. I've made sure it didn't happen like that. Once and for all.
Kate
We had a rough ride together, didn't we?
Sophie
You, too. Thanks for always putting up with me. Haha. Kate's really the one who should be saying that to me, huh? I'm sorry. I forgive you. I won't say it's okay. It wasn't. But I forgive you.
Mom
Dad
Mom*
Dad*
I don't need to think about these people anymore.
Top